This post is more explicit than usual, just a heads up. Not in a fun-sexy way, but just kind of an X-rated sexy way.
Since around the time I started having sex regularly, I knew I was into some pretty kinky shit. Not with everyone, but with most people. I was a bottom, meaning that I prefer to be the submissive one in the bedroom. I liked really rough sex; usually rough enough to leave marks for a few days, but less than a week or two. Hard spanking, being hit with a riding crop, choking, having guys tie me up and use vibrators on me, all of that. I fucking loved it. Most of the time, I preferred my kinky partners to just be fuckbuddies or casual boyfriends; I couldn't really handle the emotional weight of someone I loved hurting me physically, that would have made me feel too vulnerable even though I really got off on it. It was an odd paradox, and one that led me to seek out a lot of casual sex in my early 20s.
When I was still living in Frederick, in 2010, I started seeing this guy named Jason. We liked each other, but the chemistry wasn't all there. He was living with another girlfriend, Nico, and once I met her, I actually liked her much more than Jason. The three of us got along really well, and I started having dinner over at their place maybe once a week or so. Nico was from Argentina, and she was this amazing cook; one time I came over, she made pasta from scratch with a duck ragu. It was fucking incredible. Anyway, Nico and Jason belonged to this group, TNG. It was like a Meetup group for kinky people. They met in DC and Baltimore at bars once a month, and some of the wealthier (and older) people hosted kink parties in their houses. Jason and I went to a few TNG happy hours together. It was pretty fun to meet other people who were as open about sex as I was; in fact, it was kind of intoxicating. The happy hours obviously weren't anything that weird, they were held in public bars, so we kind of had to behave. There was a lot of gossiping (the kink community is literally filled with drama) and talking about upcoming parties. Almost all of TNG was polyamorous, which made sense; a lot of kink practices don't translate well to monogamy.
Once, at a happy hour, this blonde girl ran shrieking through the bar, laughing hysterically. She was being chased by this giant hulk of a dude, Ariel, a really pretty black guy with long dreads. He caught up with her and bent her over his lap, making this big show of spanking her. She was screaming her head off and laughing, and he was in hysterics. A few tables away, some little old ladies were glaring. They looked like they were going to shit bricks.
Ariel saw them, and stopped for a moment. He flashed a grin at the old ladies. "It's her birthday," he informed them, proudly.
There was a pause; they didn't stop staring. "Is it your birthday, too?" Ariel tried, unable to keep from laughing. The little old ladies left in a huff, muttering about the demise of humanity.
A few weeks after I'd become friendly with Jason and Nico, they told me about a kink party that was happening that weekend. It was at this mansion outside of Bethesda, oddly close to the Mormon temple, and hosted by Judy. Judy was this eccentric lady in her 60s who made a ton of money in the stock market. Her house was lavishly normal, until you got to the basement, which was a dungeon. There were different rooms, each themed, with every kind of BDSM toy or equipment known to man. There was even a medical room, with a real operating table and hospital supplies. People would start off upstairs at the party, and then move downstairs after they'd had a few drinks or wanted to watch people doing scenes. People would plan scenes in advance of the party; it wasn't uncommon to hear people saying things like "he's going to put me on the St Andrews cross at 8, but my other boyfriend might not be there in time to watch, what a bummer."
The theme of this party (they were all themed) was "Naughty or Nice." Predictably, I went as 'naughty'--ripped up black leggings over fishnets with spike heels and a black and red corset. When I drove over to Jason and Nico's to pick them up, they were arguing. Nico was in a really bad mood, and she sulked through dinner, barely speaking. Jason didn't tell me what was going on, and I didn't ask. We weren't really at that stage of friendship/dating/whatever yet.
After dinner, we all drove down in my car. Nico was sullen in the backseat and as soon as we got there, she immediately slipped off her coat and disappeared into a throng of people. Inside the front door, I had to fill out a liability waiver and hand over scanned copies of my driver's license. The house was packed; there was a really nice buffet spread out into the living room and tables with champagne flutes and two full bars. Most people were in some kind of slutty costume like mine, but a few were totally naked and some of the men were wearing tuxedos. It was a little like what I've always expected a porn set to look like. Despite what I'd heard about "no playing" upstairs, there was definitely shit going on. I sat down on one end of a big black leather sectional couch with a flute of champagne. Almost immediately afterwards, a short, squat guy walked into the living room carrying a large cardboard box; he set it down on the floor with some effort and wiped the sweat off of his brow. A quartet of tall, leggy, gorgeous blonde women followed him, squealing and yelping. They were all dressed as fembots from Austin Powers, and they jumped on the guy at once, trying to kiss him and grab his cheeks and hug him while giggling and chattering away. With a good natured sigh, he pushed them all off at once and they slid to the floor, looking disappointed, their gazes not moving from his face.
"Does he have blow?" An adorable skinny guy in a dog collar and leather leggings and nothing else perched next to me; his long legs folding underneath him like a colt. He had beautiful big blue eyes and better mascara than I did, and as I laughed, he held out his hand to shake.
"That's exactly what I was wondering," I said, under my breath, not looking away from Average Dude and The Fembots. My new friend laughed, and put his head on my shoulder.
"I'm Eric!" He chirped, reaching up to play with my hair.
"Lauren," I said, and we shook. Average Dude opened up the cardboard box, and took out what looked like a black leather cushion shaped like a half-circle. With some effort, he positioned it right in the middle of the living room and stood back with his arms folded over his chest, looking satisfied. The girls all shrieked at once; I didn't get it.
"It's a Sybian," Eric hissed in my ear. "Oh my god, I bet he gets so much pussy."
"Uh, yeah," I said, not wanting to admit that I had no idea what was coming.
"It's good for him, really," Eric went on, waving a hand in the air as he talked. "He's so short I bet he couldn't get laid otherwise!" I giggled; it was unfortunately true.
We watched, rapt, as the guy started pulling other things out of the box. He set a bunch of dildos up next the Sybian, and then some butt plugs alongside them. He was talking and joking with the Fembots--about the weather, of all things--while lining up the butt plugs from smallest to largest. I buried my head in Eric's shoulder, unable to stop laughing.
"Who wants to go first?!" He asked, and the Fembots started shoving and smacking each other, trying to be in front. One of them won the privilege, and he gestured for her to sit on the thing that he'd set up on the floor. "Oh, wait!" he paused, motioning for her to keep standing. "I forgot the puppy pads!"
Eric and I looked at each other and mouthed "puppy pads!" and I bit the inside of my mouth to keep from howling laughter. It suddenly occurred to me that I didn't really want to watch what was about to go down, and got up from the couch. Behind me, Average Dude was pulling puppy pads out of the box; he spread one over the Sybian and let the Fembot straddle it.
"Do you want to go downstairs?" I exchanged my empty champagne flute for a full one, and looked at Eric. He shrugged at me, fiddling with his collar.
"Yeah, sure," he said, looking around. "My friends ditched me as soon as we got here."
"Mine did too," I pulled a face. "They were fighting when I showed up."
Eric's eyes flashed with interest. "Ohmygod, who are your friends? Why were they fighting?"
"Uh, Nico and Jason. I don't know," I shrugged, not wanting to expose even more of their personal life.
"Ohhhh," he got a weird look on his face. "They fight a lot."
I was slightly skeptical; from the few weeks I'd known them, they had seemed pretty chill. "Really?"
"Yeah, trust me. She has a really bad temper," he said confidentially, leaning in my ear.
Downstairs, the atmosphere was much the same, but the scenery was completely different. The walls and ceiling were covered in black leather wallpaper; there were twisted silver chandeliers with actual candles burning, and leather sex furniture everywhere. The carpet was also black, and so plush I could feel it between my toes. On the walls were racks containing whips and floggers and crops and paddles; bottles of lube and disinfectant and paper towels lurked in an open cabinet. It was dimly lit, and reeked of sweat and sex. Naked people were everywhere; at one point, Eric and I were standing in front of a display until we felt something pushing us from behind. I turned around, and there was a drunk, middle-aged couple having sex in a sex swing, knocking into us with their toes.
"This is really weird," I muttered to Eric, looking down.
"Yeah, but that's part of the fun!" He was sort of dancing without really moving his feet, and eyeing every dude that came within a few feet of us. I felt really uneasy for some reason; it wasn't that I was prudish or weird about other people having sex around me, but it suddenly seemed like a bad idea to be as open about things. I started wondering how these people acted in private, when they had no one to show off for.
After a while, I started just feeling desensitized to everything. I struck up a conversation with an older dude who was standing next to a suspension set-up; there was a girl hanging upside down with a blindfold on, unmoving. We were talking about ropes and suspension bondage and then he suddenly started asking me about the traffic on the MD/DC beltway. It was fucking bizarre.
Having had enough of this, I went back upstairs. I was going to look for Jason and Nico and tell them that I wanted to head home pretty soon. I'd had plans to get late drinks with friends back in Frederick, but all I wanted to do was watch a documentary on anything other than sex and then go to sleep. Alone.
But I couldn't find them anywhere. I was seeing a lot of the same faces by this point, and people had gotten pretty drunk and started to move into the backyard. "No spanking!!!" Judy yelled at the people heading outside; at some point in the last year, another kink party had been raided by the cops after a neighbor called and complained of loud moaning coming from next door.
Finally, around midnight, I was sitting on the couch and scrolling through one of the many coffee table books that were lying around (spoiler alert: it was definitely a copy of the kama sutra). I heard screaming, and lots of people suddenly rushed from the basement into the main part of the house. There were familiar voices; some girl was shrieking at someone and calling them a bastard, and yelling in Spanish.
I got up and immediately tried to see around the crowd. In front of a large group of people, Nico was standing there, screaming at Jason. He was completely naked, and he looked really freaked out and upset. She was so angry; her face was twisted and contorted into this rage and she was throwing whatever was in reach. He dodged a flower vase, and it crashed into the wall behind him, shattering. Water flew everywhere, the people in the group in front of me started screaming. I felt like I was on a really bad reality TV show; this was getting to be way too much for me to handle.
After that, I went outside and sat in my car, chainsmoking. Eventually, the dude with the Sybian came outside, carrying a giant box. He saw me sitting in my car and came over to chat, but I only rolled down the window a couple of inches because I was kind of creeped out by him. When I told him I was waiting for Jason and Nico, he smirked at me and dropped a business card through the crack in my car window. Ew.
They came out about three hours later; Nico was looking smug and resting her head on Jason's shoulder. He was wearing a towel wrapped around his waist and snowboots, because it was the middle of winter but apparently that hadn't occurred to his psycho girlfriend when she was ripping off his clothes and throwing various items at his head. They greeted me like it was no big deal that they'd been acting like fucking psychos for the past few hours, and I tried hard to ignore them.
"Sorry we took a while," Nico yawned, burying her face in Jason's neck. "God, I'm really tired."
"Yeah, really sorry," Jason muttered, flopping down in the backseat of my car. "Can we stop at Taco Bell on the way home?"
When we got back to Frederick, I parked at my apartment and made them walk home in the frigid weather. And that's when I left the kink scene.